Passport Pictures
“OMG! That’s, ME? Okay, That’s I?”
“That’s you, sweetheart.”
“Damn, lie to me, woman, don’t let me try to sleep tonight with that ugly truth in my sub-conscious.”
“You ‘OMGed’ when you saw you new driver’s license some months ago.”
“Yeah, I know, but, at least, the Driver’s License was in vivid color. This passport picture looks more black and white than color – more gray than black… Geez, my eyes look vacant and without any show of life…”
“Come on, honey, you’re becoming obsessed. I never knew your ego to go this far out north of kilter. You know drivers’ licenses and passport pictures are always horrible.”
“Yeah, I know you’re right, but it’s still a shock seeing my face in a depressing morgue’s gray slide-out chamber… By the way, where the hell might we be going? We just got to Phoenix a few weeks ago. That’s a beastly long drive for an internationally successful and wealthy author.”
“Uh, darling, you’re spacing out again…forget who you’re talking to?”
“I believe that should be, ‘…to whom you’re talking?”
“Oh, shut up and eat your oatmeal, grammar-hog.”
“I hate oatmeal! You know, your passport is no image winner, either!”
“Okay, I’m taking your oatmeal away.”
“That was the plan, dear heart.”
“You and your passport make good companions. I’m giving your oatmeal to ‘Lady Gray’.”
“Okay, that ‘draws the line’ so I’m using my ‘Executive Privilege’. You may not torture my beautiful ‘Lady Gray’ by feeding her something that only you like… You and your new passport sleeping in the guest room tonight?”
“No, you are!”
“Ah, you win some and you lose some…um, no kiss, ‘goodnight’…”
BR Chitwood – Feb. 20, 2020
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